Shallowness does not always equate to material possessions. Not in my world. We often allow opportunities to pass because of a material possession we believe we need. Some are necessary for survival/comfort but most are not. We give up experiences in favour of a new couch. We give up living in favour of a new kitchen.
Do you look at your new parquet flooring and understand what you gave up for it?
Are you disguising pain by imprisoning yourself with purchases? I have heard it said, “I can’t leave him, we just redid the bathroom”.
Can the material take the place of a love that has died? Sadly many try to bind a partner by major material structural commitment. Once the children have grown up how do you keep your partner? Redo the house? Build an extension? Is it possible for a loft conversion to keep you together? Amazingly, it can. It forces you both to focus elsewhere and not at the dying marriage. But how long before you need to call in a builder?
And if you are single? Yes, an item in your home can temporarily replace the partner you may still hope to find. But if you took an opportunity instead you might find someone who comes with furniture.
Naturally, in our ideal world it would be great to have it all. But for most of us our choices must reflect what is most beneficial. We can enjoy the praise of friends who admire our new furnishings or we can play privately in our minds the experiences we lived.
Are you one of those who believes that you’ll live a dream event once you have sorted the material world to your satisfaction, or when you have retired? Let us hope you are still physically able to do the things you planned.
Some of us change our priorities: leave the kitchen cabinet doors off their hinges; overlook the scratches on the parquet floor. Allow a throw to cover the worn sofa. We can go solo on empirical adventures, or involve friends, or invite our children. I suspect our children will forget the peeling paint in their childhood home as they look back on the laughter, the amazement, the surprise, the togetherness and know their experiences are rich.

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